A while back, maybe even as far back as “the goal” in the 2010 World Cup I resolved to never again refer to Landon Donovan as, “Landycakes” and I have remained true to this vow. I was even understanding of his brief “hiatus” from the game given all that he had given to it at both the domestic and international level. Sure, I’ve been happy to point out that he has been surpassed- at a sprint- by Clint Dempsey as the “best American player ever” and that, quite frankly, except for his short loan spells at Everton he has been a bust at any club level above that of Major League Soccer.
Generally, however, I’ve given him his due and left it at that. But Landon, sometimes it’s just better to take your medicine and move on. Here is a comment Donovan had following his Galaxy’s 5-0 pummeling at the hands (feet?) of the New England Revolution on Sunday, when asked about playing on the artificial turf at Gillette Stadium:
“the last ball sometimes gets away, it’s a little bobbly, the shots aren’t as clean, so that’s always a challenge”
Let me be clear, I HATE artificial turf. No outdoor match should ever be played on it. BUT, as the saying goes, both teams had to play on it and somehow the Revolution were able to handle those little “bobbles” and knock five goals past you. I know, Landon, I know, the Revolution play at least half of all their matches on turf and the Galaxy probably don’t. But guess what? Based on pedigree and accomplishments you were- by far- the most accomplished player to take part in the match and you, perhaps more than anyone else, should have been able to rise above it and produce more than your single shot on goal.
The bigger issue here, however, is that these are the kinds of comments that gave you the coddled and, dare I say, “soft” reputation that you’ve done so well to distance yourself from in the past few years. So, as much as I hate to have to do it, I’m putting you on notice: any more of this nonsense and the Landycakes moniker will be back in use at The Tanner Ba’, and incessantly so.